Like Mice

Mike bought me a treadmill last Saturday. Belated 40th birthday present.

(Not in the same category as a blender or toaster gift. I really wanted this.)

It was delivered early Tuesday morning.

(Who would want/need a treadmill when you have year-round tropical weather and a pool and beach at your doorstep? Easy answer: air conditioning, satellite TV plus gorgeous views out the floor-to-ceiling windows while watching speed and incline and hundreds of calories burned.)

"Loco," said Mike to the two burly guys providing Roatan's version of white glove delivery. "She es Loco." They all chuckled and nodded vigorously. Private guy joke. Loco gringo lady wants to go round and round on a treadmill.

They might be right.

It's after dark on Thursday, and I still haven't used it.

I got close this evening: I had a plan. Mike would come home from his new job as high school director in Sandy Bay, and I'd get in 30 minutes right before Delaney and Hayden's dinner.

It had been a rough day. No babysitter. Mike away. 9am call from our Realtor, saying clients are coming unexpectedly. Rush to clean house AND supervise two toddlers simultaneously. Sweep one room, only to see flower petals, play dough and cracker crumbs covering the next room. No nap. Big mess of a malfunctioning diaper, all over both cribs, an hour before house-hunters are to arrive. Desperate trip to market for baby wipes and milk, ending with broken bottle of red wine at the check-out. I cry and admit I can't control my kids. Realtor cancels unexpected visit.

I get as far as finding my sneakers and the treadmill key. Then an invasion of enormous black ants. Literally. Swarming the entryway in grotesque pulsing lines and heading for the living room. 30 minutes of sweeping and spraying and cajoling ants and children away from the front door, back back back where you came from.

Senor Gomez, our gardener, says the ants mean that it's going to rain.

There's not a cloud in the sky.

I prep dinner and then try again while Mike and babies take a shower. I turn the fan onto high. Phone rings, right while I'm finding my perfect indulgent exercise-motivating TV channel. 20-minute conversation, mostly on the other side. Cardio not in the cards.

Dinner time.

Delaney devours her hamburger. Hayden is up and down and all around. He pulls on the tablecloth, bringing beef and broccoli hailing down.

Forget the treadmill, time for that glass of wine.

If only it hadn't spilled all over the floor of Eldon's.

I love them, at the end of the day. It's from dawn to dusk that makes me Loco.


  1. Once again, Alecia, after reading about your trials and tribulations, I am convinced you are truly on your way to sainthood!

  2. As Julia Child was fond of saying, "a little more wine!" Dump the treadmill, buy wine by the case, not the bottle and unwind from those long days in a white or red kinda way.


  3. Alecia,
    I agree with David! You get a cardio workout every day in toddlerland!

  4. Political unrest. A million ants. No more than one loaf of fresh bread a day. A pool that changes color when you go away. No Yankees on TV. There isn;t enough wine in the Southern Hemisphere to mediate that condition.



  5. The great thing about treadmills is that they are always there when you need them... enjoy the thought of just having it!

  6. Just read a few of your family blog entries, and I'm marveling at your courage, both for moving to Roatan and for rearing twins there. I gathered from one blog entry that you have or will spend time at the Tyler Place in northern Vt. We're in Williamstown, MA, but get well up into Vt fairly often because we have a boat in Charlotte and a bunch of friends (a couple of whom worked at Tyler Place when they were in college) around Burlington and above.

    Alecia, we haven't met, but I admire your amazing stamina.

    Speaking of boats, I spent a week with Runyon in March since he needed help sailing his beautiful boat back from Bahamas to Beaufort, NC. We talked about you, Mike, but we couldn't think of anything derogatory to say: memory problems must be a factor there. Runyon has 3 sons, the youngest a soph in college now. Runyon's eldest almost went to Loomis, but changed his mind at the last minute. Our daughter (also now a college soph) almost went to LC too, but then she chose another school. I was relieved!

    All best,

  7. Such true words... "I love them, at the end of the day. It's from dawn to dusk that makes me Loco."


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